Red Dog Poo and Gray Car Interior

Good Valentine's to all of my myspace friends! Time for a funny? Laugh at my expense, like usual, it's ok. On Wednesday of this week, my Uncle who lives in Perryton 30 miles from my home asked me to do him a big favor and pick his dog up from the vet and bring her home because she had already spent one unnecessary night there, and he was not going to have time for her that day either. He was going to pay me an undisclosed sum of money to do this for him, and I accepted. I had never met this little dog, and was nervous about her trying to get away from me or something, so when I picked her up (along with a box of heart worm pills and some instructions) I did not let her run around before I loaded her into my gray interior auto. I put her in the back, and closed the hatch. She was very still, and laid right down on the giant empty feed sack I had used as a floor guard should she puke or something. Off we went. 30 miles, not far. We had travelled approximately 10 or 15 miles when I smelled a dog fart, no, not a fart, worse! I wheeled into a lease road ASAP, and ran to the back of my car to survey the scene. When I opened the door, she jumped out, and what I saw all over the gray carpet, and not even a little on the sack, was a whole bunch of bad stuff the color of this blog! Remember, gray carpet. I just kind of ignored the poor dog, who was convinced a whipping was coming in her future. I ran back to the console to get the Kleenex and baby wipes I keep for tiny spills or runny noses, and went back to try to do something about the mess. I flung Kleenex all over that road, and only got the top layer, or what I could actually pick up, which wasn't much. I had it on me, and had to clean up my own self before moving on. The dog was not wanting to load back up, and I am sure thought I was going to whip her good, but after trying for a while, she finally came to me, and I put her back on the UNUSED sack for the rest of the trip. I was nearly in tears the rest of the way, but dropped her off and raced to the local Alco Discount store to get some products. I was in a real hurry. I was on the clock. This color could do permanent damage, and I knew time was of the essence. The first guy in line at the check out had only a few items, but the lady checking out was not in any kind of a hurry, and actually appeared to be reading the labels on his stuff before she scanned them. He paid with a debit. Well, wouldn't you know it, the freaking card machine would not read it. She needed assistance from a super genius person about 30 feet away, and this lady was not in a hurry either. I am close to panic. She finally moseys over, and it won't work. The guy is just standing there, and they are looking at him like what should we do, and he is knowing my eyes are two people back burning holes in his stupid credit card. Suddenly, the machine came to life, and out whizzed a receipt, and off he went, 15 minutes later. Febreeze is heavy in bulk. Then the next lady right in front of me steps up to bat. She has a few things, and again the lady appears to CHECK out the stuff. When the last beep had gone off, the lady writes out a check, slowly, and hands it over. Nope. They need to see an ID, and she doesn't have it on her. OK, I am about to blow! Flippin' retard, who tries to write a check these days without an ID? She is going to have to go home to get it. In all this time, the little scummy group manager lady has not offered to help one soul on that store with their goods, and I could have used it, would have paid extra! Well, I am thinking they are going to have everyone wait for this dumb dumb to go to her house, but she finally asks Group manager lady, with 6 plastic children's hair clips in her ugly hair, to come help her clear the register. She looks like that lady on Throw Momma From the Train and Goonies. Anyway, I had been standing in line now for 30 minutes, or close to it with: 1 jug of Cheer detergent, 1 large bottle of Woolite pet stain remover, 2 cans of Febreeze air effects, 1 spray bottle of Extra strength febreeze for fabric, and one large box of Sham Wows. My hands were breaking, and my heart was breaking with the thought of the permanent orange stains I knew I could not live with. She finally cleared out the register, and said "Sorry". She read my stuff too, and I paid IN CASH, $42, and left in a hurry. I drove to my dad's house and began the gruesome task. It was awful. I scrubbed, and cussed, and used those ShamWows. They really do work. That pet stain stuff was pretty good too, under the circumstances. After about an hour or so, I was as satisfied as I was going to get. I drove home and recapped my day in my mind. You know, I never ask how much. Never. It never occurred to me to ask my uncle how much he was going to pay me. He was family, no sweat, right? No good deed ever goes unpunished. Lesson learned. Always put a large and not special blanket down for a dog fresh from the vet, and always let them run around a bit before loading them. I know dogs, and I failed this test. People, pay attention, BLANKET-RUN AROUND. Got it? thanks for reading. Til next time.